More On Success In Relationships, According to Esther Perel

The foundations to healthy relationships change as we experience life events. Through these events, we must balance two pillars—according to Esther Perel.

INTIMACY (safety)

As Esther Perel states, there are moments where we feel as though “I am enough.” Such as when we have newborns, when we feel safety in our partner’s arms, when we feel familiarity & belonging..

These situations are most formally known as intimate moments where we grow together in a relational partnership. This is the first of fundamental human needs—

This is the first of the two pillars we have to balance our romance—our need for togetherness, for love.

DESIRE (erotic love)

In contrast, Perel states that—Opposed to these safe/intimate situations in love, we have another need in love—boldness, adventure, where we take risks. Wreckless and dangerous moments are the other pillar in which we need in order to be in romantic balance.

This is the latter of fundamental human needs for risk, discovery, adventure

This second pillar of love is our need for freedom, for desire.